The Sweet 25:
What Positive Child Guidance IS:
1. Paying attention to me (noticing my new shoes or my new haircut!)
2. Keeping promises and doing what you say you will do
3. Using a gentle voice with me
4. Letting me finish my sentence
5. Treating me like I am really important to you
6. Remembering that I have feelings, too
7. Looking for the best in me
8. Understanding that when I mess up it’s usually because I don’t know how to do it right
9. Taking time to listen (with your ears and with your eyes)
10. Being patient with me (especially when I am having trouble)
11. Meeting the needs of all of us
12. Having consistent expectations with all of us
13. Knowing that the person who you might quickly suspect is not always the guilty one
14. Teaching me how to do it right
15. Protecting my self-esteem in front of my friends
16. Making me look good in front of my friends
17. Respecting me in front of my friends
18. Teaching me how to have friends
19. Smiling at me when you say my name
20. Saying nice things about me
21. Being kind to me
22. Being calm with me when I get angry and lose control
23. Starting each new day with a “clean slate”
24. Caring very much about how I feel or what I think
25. Knowing that I really want to please you
Positive Child Guidance is all about developing positive and responsive relationships with children. These relationships then foster trust and mutual respect. Children need teachers who not only teach them but also care about them. Children need teachers who listen to them and watch them so that their behaviors (both positive AND negative) are understood. “Children who have warm, close, supportive relationships with their … teacher, are more likely to have better relationships with other children, do well academically, and have fewer behavior problems in early childhood and elementary classrooms,” (Gallagher and Mayer 2008-2009, 144).
[Secure people] are less likely to be defensive and more likely to face negative emotional episodes with honesty, attempting to move on and enhance their lives…This gift translates into more child courage, more competence, more friendliness, and the ability to rebound from life’s troubles and empathize and cooperate with peers and adults (Honig 2002, xiii).
Isn’t that what we want for all of our children in the 21st century?!
To learn more about Positive Behaviors In the Classroom order our new ebook version on Amazon.com